Notes From The Smoking Area

Andy Burn’em: BANNER of BBQs and Killer of Planets.

Our ‘Prime Minister’ has urged shops in the UK to stop selling disposable BBQs to help…
Why friendship break ups hurt more.

Around 6 years ago my best friend and I- we broke up. I say we broke…
On the Fringe

Hear ye! Hear ye! It is the 79th Edinburgh Fringe Festival where over 4,000 different shows…
But let me please the people!

You are not a therapist and you must stop talking like one. I say this when…
Dundee Born and Read.

When anyone asks me where I am from, I always say Dundee. Then I have to…
Snapchat memories cured my self image

When my nervous system finally settles at night and I finally feel relaxed and ready to…
National Pride

While politicians from both sides tell us how to feel about immigration, there’s a truth being…
BOYcott

Sometimes when I’m touching myself I worry the people on the other side of my iPhone…
The Philosophy of a Night Out

The nightclub industry is dying. Not if I can fucking help it. Listen to me carefully…
NO GUTS NO GLORY

May 2026 Hello! If you happen to be reading this I am operating at 100% baller…