Notes From The Smoking Area

May 2026

Hello! 

If you happen to be reading this I am operating at 100% baller 0% pussy bitch. 

In January 2026 it dawned on me that I had been graduated since July 2024. What the hell was I doing ? 

Working in retail, that’s what. 

“I am operating at 100% baller 0% pussy bitch.“

I said to myself if I cannot find a job that allows me to earn a wage that pays for my life outside of work- I am going to quit and try and become a full time writer. 

Then in March 2026 the closest I came to a new career was a job at a bank phoning bereaved relatives to let them know their dead loved one still owed us money.

My brain, perhaps correctly, chose “unemployed struggling writer

I really should take this moment to persuade you to stay and read this and come back for more but I can accept right now if you’ve come this far I’ve probably asked that you read this. 

But this is for all you all fur coat no knickers types- this is a safe space. 

I hope to see you again soon,

I am as shocked as anyone that I didn’t completely shit the bed on this, I am proud of myself for that…

July 2026

I wrote this essay a few months ago now, when I felt as though I was still manifesting this moment. But on the 25th of June, I actually left my job.

Since then, my life has changed drastically in only a few weeks. The anticipation of this moment felt like I was being walked to the end of a plank with my hand and legs bound.

But then, I jumped.

“I am jumping with the confidence of a man who knows what is waiting for him when he lands.”

Both metaphorically and actually from boats in Greece (more to follow). But almost each day since I have left my job to pursue writing I have done something wildly out of my comfort zone.

Be it cold water swimming on an Island in the Outer Hebrides or cycling 38km around said Island (TRUST more to follow on that) or exploring towns in countries I have never set foot in before or launching my first publication.

All things that I did not think I could do until I did them.

I am no longer searching for evidence of failure.

I am jumping with the confidence of a man who knows what is waiting for him when he lands.

Perhaps I become a writer extraordinaire or I will be crawling back to my old job cap in hand- but either way I can die a man who tried.

That is enough for right now…